On the Mayor's Mind

Mayor Shari Winstead

Respect.  It’s a big word, and one I’ve touched on before. But I have a new perspective on it.  

Recently at my day-job, the mandate came down that everyone was required to attend “Respectful Workplace” training. You could almost feel the collective eye roll from seven floors of employees. For those of us who have been working in the corporate world for over half of our lives, we have lived through many corporate initiatives, heard all kinds of corporate buzz words and even buzz sentences. They come and go, it’s just part of the deal. Most of us do our best to embrace the newest initiative, even if it is with the collective sigh.

One of the cool things about getting older is that you come to understand what “perspective” really means, because you get perspective with experience (or, rather “age”). Twenty years ago I would have been extremely annoyed that my employer felt the need to tell us, lawyers and staff alike, all very educated and professional, what we should or shouldn’t be saying to our co-workers. 

But at my still somewhat new age of 50, I have a different perspective. I sat quietly and listened (respectfully). After hearing many examples of some pretty strict do’s and don’ts, (don’t say “that dress looks really nice on you” or ask an Asian person if they know a good Chinese restaurant), it was hard not to feel doomed to say the wrong thing to someone. Chances are most of us probably will- probably have- said something that could be construed as disrespectful, and most likely, it was an off-hand comment, or completely unintentional. 

Most of us probably got the best advice of our life at a very young age. I was probably around 10 years old. “Think before you speak”. Often this advice is self-preservation - don’t make yourself look foolish. “Speed Kills” was the term used at the respectful workplace training. Don’t be so quick to make a funny, offhand comment. Do you really know your audience? Will a comment that is funny to some be offensive to one? If so, maybe you should skip it. Sometimes being respectful isn’t about what you say, but about what you don’t say.

We are blessed to live in a diverse community. Sometimes we take it for granted, or don’t make the effort to explore it. Part of appreciating the diversity is putting respect into play. Think about the questions you ask, the statements you make, the rants you may have. Take a moment to know the people who are listening to you and be kind with your words. No matter who we are, what we do, where we are from, our gender preference or background, everyone deserves respect. And I was appreciative that I had an employer who cared enough to make sure we gave a little more thought to how our words affect those around us.